..THAT ECHO LIKE A HOME

Sometimes it happens
That
We exist in the places
We never existed
And we stay back
To listen to them
Like that promise
Which was made to us
To let us know
That we existed there
Life has a destiny
But has destinations
Which we seldom know
We need to go there
To speak in voids
To see if it echoes
A voice
That calls us
Sometimes
Asks us to come back
Missing our roots
We go there again
For, if we have to be
We need to exist
Not just there
But in all spaces
That echo like a home

©SantoshChaubey

MEMORIES….

It was yet a summer day
Seven years to that winter
When it was a different song
And with a difficult note
So rough was its melody
That all was lost into it
So intensely it was done
That he was left all to him
Days were frosty and alone
Even if it was a summer sun
Life flowed, melted
Left bruised, dispirited
The winter that stayed
In a summer that swayed
Seven years to that winter
It was again a summer day
In by-lanes of memories
When it all came rushing in
That’s still a different song
Been there all along
But seven years is so long
That it has got all along
Staying there, in a corner
Albeit, without its marker

©SantoshChaubey

SOMETIMES, YOU JUST NEED TO WANDER IN A LOST REALM

Sometimes, you just need to walk away
Withdraw even from your days that make you
To sit in the cradle of nowhere and its voids
Where you can feel you are lost
Free from the hangovers of why it happened so
Where questioning things becomes immaterial
Because even answers lose relevance at times
You feel you just don’t want to listen to
Even if silence has been speaking all along
You go so deep inside a bottomless chasm
Where all melt, your identities and questions
And you just flow in an aimless direction
Feeling nothing of everything and such emotions
Of relations, of existences, of illusions
As if they have ceased to exist
And you just feel like staying there
Not knowing if you need to go back
Sometimes, you just need to withdraw
And need to wander in a lost realm
Feeling nothing to make sense again, like yesterday
Trying to feel if tomorrow really matters

©SantoshChaubey

O CHILDHOOD

O childhood
I was again lost in your innocence
When you didn’t ask me why
Your anger looks so complete
For both of us
That it doesn’t need words
Like that expression on your face
As natural, as reactive,
As life is supposed to be
You speak when you feel
You react when you have to
A freedom so natural to us
Yet we have to crave for it
In a life, driven by compulsions
We have almost forgotten
What it is about being a human
Our broken souls do cry inside
But in a painted world
Where we selectively cry
As it is invitational to its semiotics
And so to our inhibitions
When I see you o childhood
I realize what I have lost in life
And I go through this grind so often

©SantoshChaubey

I AM STILL LIVING IT AS MY SOUL

Let’s go there today, beyond those inhibitions
Life has taken so long and yet there is no word
Wait is a good experience only when it speaks
It sucks when silence forgets how to express
It might have been your soulful decision once
But it has betrayed you for so long that it hurts
You may not express it, but I, too, share its pain
We had walked together when life had a story
We are still walking together, trying to rewrite it
I have my words in place, but it is your time now
Come along the words our souls weaved then
In the worlds where the story had a conscience
I lived my part and I am still living it as my soul
You could not but I never felt any inhibition
It was not that I was strong and you were weak
Probably, words could not fall in place for you
I knew where our worlds were going to take us
I lived your questions all along, like my echoes
But you found yourself trapped by inhibitions
Yes, I was strong enough to see through them
I never asked for your reasons but now I say
Come beyond those inhibitions and reasons
The story that you left there, is still speaking

©SantoshChaubey

FAITH

Why faith is so deep
That it is never complete
Yet it is so reassuring
That it never gets obsolete
But then what it should be
And what it would be
If it wouldn’t be so
If we believe in a God
It should be beyond
The questions of logic
Yet it is never illogical
Your God never says
That don’t question His ways
Doing so is human
And if we all are His creation
It is His wish for us to do so
There is a God
Who lives in all of us
Only if we care to listen to him
When you question Him, His ways
You are being logical
And your faith is evolving
God comes to you
Naturally, subtly
That you don’t realize it
But it happens
That you find your answers
Or questions become irrelevant
God is then being logical with you
By letting your faith evolve
Whenever it happens
Your faith goes even deeper
There comes times
When we feel disoriented
But the connect is always there
That keeps us rooted
And shows us the way ahead finally
It becomes stronger every time
Our faith is so deep
That it is always a part of us
Only if we care enough to listen to it
And when we question, we do that
Doing so helps us to see beyond
The questions of logic
That is faith, His faith, ours faith

©SantoshChaubey

JOURNEY

It was a jolly good feeling
It was some happy mingling
Days were fully expressed
Words were fully dressed
The distance looked inviting
In full gear, like dancing
Some journeys tell stories
With new discoveries
Which keep you on the go
Penetrating you like a fresco
All those years in between
It was an experience so keen
Sometimes, it was dark
At times, it was so stark
Like always with its spark
Here it was our common arch
That we had had for so long
Yes, it’s where we belong
Life may send us adrift
But they were there to lift
It’s not how often we met
It’s not it was always so great
But, yes, we felt for each of us
That finally got us to meet thus

©SantoshChaubey

RETROSPECTION

That strange thought came suddenly
Crying out silently in the wilderness
Where leaves had stopped speaking
And the dew had a unseasonal dryness
And asked if I was ready for that
But what was that it didn’t tell
Was it something I was just thinking
Or an impression from days in past
The oddity of the thought pushed me
To revisit that me who was once here
Speaking in tones that so enthused
Like it was one of those thrills
That you spend your lifetime to have
There were lanes bright and closed
And the corridors of ringing bliss
It was a life that bathed me daily
That freshness initiated my days
With a clarity the morning dew spoke
And it would remain there
But I cannot say what happened
On a day when it didn’t speak
And lived a strange silence afterwards
I knew a retrospection was not there
But my introspection told me to do so
I was hurt, and so that person in me
But we both understood each other
Life had some plans and it went on
I don’t know if that part of me had his
But as years faded away from us
We learnt to get along to the extent
That we didn’t discuss about that
But this strange thought is pushing me
To introspect again for a retrospection
I don’t know if I would go for it
But at the moment, I am stuck with it

©SantoshChaubey

RECKONING

What it is in life that you so care for
Wasn’t it the day’s reckoning
To make amends with your conscience
Something refined, something sublime
It was a moment to go thoughtless
But why couldn’t you go beyond
There is a sky which has its own limits
And it was eager to get along with you
Sharing its pious abode of togetherness
It was an invitation that cared for you
It is that you still don’t want to go out
But how long will you remain like this
Absorbed in your moments as you go
You had to come here and speak up
What did you think about the black line
That you saw between you and beyond
You need to answer yourself
You don’t believed in the day of reckoning
But why can’t you go with the day’s reckoning?

©SantoshChaubey

QUESTIONS..QUESTIONS..

Questions that life so habitually throws
That sometimes they get that overdose
To the extent that it becomes so gloomy
Instead of a simple row with life
Questions, sometimes, embrace thorns
When it had to be a rose, even if verbose
Questions, sometimes, lose their repose,
And, at times, repulse to a listless state
Questions, sometimes, lose their weaving
Any why! Only in order to get apposed
Questions, sometimes, bring us together
But at times, they also send us afar
Questions, sometimes, push us to the altar
When we seem to be lost in a war within
Questions, sometimes, they leave their scars
Visible even in a future where past sucks
Questions, sometimes, split you
Ready with a scimitar, to mutilate you
Questions, sometimes, bring some thoughts
That you find you are totally at odds with
Questions, sometimes, create complexes
To simply get you confused in their maze
Questions, sometimes, ask like a fanatic
As to, why don’t you follow this zealot
Questions, sometimes, behave like an abbot
Who is ready to wait till infinity for his godot
Questions, sometimes, question their space
But a void is all that covers their face

©SantoshChaubey