REFLECTING ON..AS A YEAR COMES..

For the love of writing
With the thrill of ride
For the joy of thinking
With a canvas so wide

To nature’s hallways
To its rhythmic slopes
To nature’s galleries
Through its sky ropes

For the love of writing
In the mood of romantics
For the pull of reflecting
In the league of semantics

My story in 365 days
My stories of 365 days
A life rejoiced every day
A though lived on its way

Writing it on my days
Riding it on my ways
Aiming high all it says
Thinking right all it prays

That is what is to be
It was what set me free
A life in own company
A thought in its harmony

Reflecting on as a year comes
Writing on as its day beckons
So far, the trip has been fine
And the pleasure is all mine..

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey –https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

A YEAR GOES BY..REFLECTING ON..

It was 365 days ago, the Tuesday on December 31, 2013, the day of symbolic transition of time, from one to the next milestone, from a year to the next, on the timescale, designed to keep track of times our lives pass through, that I was writing a poem, ‘A Year Goes By’, musing on the days the year had for me.

Doing so is always existentially individual. And here is the Wednesday of December 31, 2014, with an hour left.

Like any other event of life, it is for the perspectives that what we think on this day, how we reflect on the days gone by. Practically, it changes nothing much, apart from the psychological symbolism that gives us the frame to look back, to reflect on – on what was a year in life, a capsule of time, adding to the story of our existence, adding stories as the year proceeded, adding elements as the days changed the calendar entry.

And it is never a zero-sum game – positive or negative, you gain something, in terms of experiences – vital enough to guide you if you can hear the call.

I had not thought of any resolutions on December 31, 2014, like I always did. Yes, I had my reflections and accordingly had certain stopovers to head to, but there was nothing in the realm of ‘pinned’. Instead, it was living life fully, my way, every day.

How successful I have been? Now success is a relative term and should be left to personal, intimate considerations. Like every life, I had my share of good and bad and routine but I didn’t see any point, like always, to assess my life in ‘gain or loss’ terms. I could do what I had thought to do. I could not do certain things that were in my mind. But I could continue doing certain things that I needed to do.

I wrote freely, extending and building on my way of life, going deeper inside me, on the journey to reclaim me that had its origin on a day, exactly four years ago, December 31, 2010, a setback that first pushed me to question my identity vehemently, setting me thus on the path to find who I was before the reason of the setback had taken over my thinking, and later on, became the light to guide me to go even deeper inside, in my own company. Yes, the identity crisis was over a long ago but identity is a lifetime love.

2014 saw definitive development on my books, two of them I am working on. The flow was good initially and I had thought I would be able to finish the drafts by the year end. But, then the writer’s block crept in (if I can claim to have one ). So, while the thoughts kept on building and finding space in my notes, the drafts didn’t progress to completion. Anyway, the block is over now and I think I am going to take it with the same love I had.

Meanwhile, I could finally bring up my website – http://www.santoshchaubey.com – to extend my blogging experience to a formal and diversified content platform. Some of my content is already categorized there and as I am going to take it as extension of my notebooks, it will see constant experiments and updates.

Writing is relief and release and I explored the canvas for newer realms and blogging continued to have some of its share through my regular blogs – http://severallyalone.blogspot.in/ and https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/ – and my themed blogs – http://www.banarascalling.com/ and http://santoshchaubey.tumblr.com/ – with 550 posts including – articles, poems, photographs, experimented images and quotes. For my first blog, ‘Beyond This Life’ or ‘Severally Alone’ (http://severallyalone.blogspot.in/), it was also the third ‘no breaks’ calendar year in a row.

During the course of writing, I did something that I had not done in years. I don’t remember the last time when I had watched a full movie in theatre. I prefer the home video option, even if it means some wait. I am not a film buff but I admire and revisit the good cinema and home videos give me the liberty to do so at my own pace while at the same time help me in building my library. But 2014 had the final episode of JRR Tolkien’s Middle Earth story, as filmed by Peter Jackson, scheduled in December. It was capping the second Middle Earth trilogy of Jackson’s stint with Tolkien’s land of fantasy after 11 years when the best of the lot, ‘The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King’, a landmark in narrating a book on screen, was released in 2003 and there was an urge to see the trilogies side-by-side, in their totalities, on how the craft of filmmaking had performed comparatively.

Now the home video would not come before April 2015. So, for my urge for the comparative study, I decided to take the route long forgotten when I picked up the movie in a theatre on Saturday, December 13.

Now, in few hours, the 4 of 2014 would transition to 5 of 2015. So, while the three digits would remain the same, the fourth different one would cause the next cycle on the timescale to begin, like the eternal message of living that says – ‘tomorrow is built on today with learning from yesterday’ – remember, life is never a zero-sum game.

It would be another calendar year with 365 new days to explore, to write, to read, to travel, to create new ideas, new stories, rewriting the oldies, clicking and capturing the known and unknown while continuing on the inward journey.

With the freedom of ‘no resolutions’ – with the freedom of my commitment to my conscience to live every day meaningfully liberated – with the freedom to make every day an opportunity!

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey –https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

LIVE YOUR SENSE OF THE DAY

Play or play not
May or may be not
Outlaw and outlandish
Sensible or gibberish
Shed the inhibitions
Tear into questions
Rewrite interpretations
Soak into the moment of,
Your resurrection
Enjoy the outlaw of May
Live your sense of the Day
Play it or play it not
Kill the dimensions
Let it be on the plane of,
Your intentions
Sensible is what,
Makes sense to you
Buy the gibberish,
To get your clue
Overwrite prescriptions
Do away with suggestions
Play it now or play it not
Set you free, let it be

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

IT IS NOW A PART OF ME

I would not say it didn’t affect
That would be unlike being me
I would not seek you to regret
That I never expected to be

You went,
Taking away a part of me
You left,
Splitting the Soul inside me
You disappeared,
Shaking my sense of ‘being

Still, you existed,
Why I don’t know
Yes, life would be different
If it were still for us
My thoughts aren’t mine
When it still comes to you

I’ll not say it doesn’t affect
That is unlike being me
Why so, but I don’t regret
Somehow, it is now a part of me

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

A YEAR COMES..

THE SYMBOLISM OF A DAY

The transition
The symbolism of a day
To look back on
To feel the days gone by

To rehash the milestones
To recap the pains
To read them yet again
To text the symbolism

For the transition
Of a day’s identity
With its past
For its present

To make its tomorrow
The new Today
To renew the life
With a new pledge

To read the life
With a new you

The symbolism
Of a day’s transition
Happening everyday
Rejuvenates your identity

The symbolism
Of a day’s transition
From a year to the next
Is for, to reflect on a life

A year comes for the day
To add new elements
To its identity
With everyday newness

A day comes
To come everyday
To open up the vistas
For you to achieve more
For you to be more of you

A year comes
For every tomorrow
To make your today
For every day
To make your day

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

A YEAR GOES BY..

Cerebral promises
A year worked on
And a life dedicated
Thoughtful commitment
The quest and its statement

An inner urge to go beyond
It’s been a year worked on
An enlightened journey upslope
A pledge to go for the kill
A sentient resolve to respond

Cerebral periodicals
A year worked on
The seminal dissent
And a call taken in
Outwitting the inimical

A year goes by
A year comes now
An invitation to thrill
An inclination to drill
It is to be the way uphill

A meaningful year goes by
Advent of great days knocks
The music gets subtler
The song gets into the veins
Yes, for the cerebral promises

A year worked on
A year goes by
A year comes now
To be worked on
In the quest to go beyond

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

BUT I KNOW WHO I AM

I may not know where I am

I may not know where headed I am

But I know who I am

 

I may not touch the wind

I may not soak the rain

I may not feel the Zen

I may not end up in the heaven

But I know I am not afraid anymore

 

Excruciating, reverberating, rejuvenating

Moments had their breathe squeezing

When they saw the disaster impending

Moments sang the song of the thrill

The voice became softer devoid of any shrill

 

I stand there, quiet,

To wage another fight

Moments reckon of the looming night

Inviting me

To the darkness of uncertainty

But I know

I am still there

For your smile of serenity

And,

I will zoom past this night

 

I may not know where I am

I may not know where headed I am

But I know who I am

 

Its stranger still!

Life, a loser, calls, says! Behold

Let’s fight again,

For the sake of romance of fighting

For the joy of adventure of losing

 

Its stranger still!

Life recalls, says! Listen

We have been the bedfellows

Always fighting

Never thinking of going away

 

You see your win I see mine

You claim your survival

I claim my revival

I have been there, listening

To all, it says, sifting

Through, what it means

Assimilating what it aims

Reading what it failed to name

 

I know through its odd sways

I will, again, find my ways

I know I am the one, whom

I have been looking for

Though

I may not know where I am

I may not know where headed I am

But I know who I am

 

Life, you say I was mismatched

And there,

You so deliberately crashed

O’ your materialist ways, with

Layers of assorted ambiguities

I was there, I am there, I will be there

With all my ‘too’ simplistic ethos and mores

That you found so hard to believe

That,

You went on to the extent, to

Deceive

 

O’ life, but

Isn’t it your way to go?

A flow, marked with

Such dismay

That you ceased to exist for me

 

I won’t take anymore of your artificial beauty

I won’t listen to anymore of your cacophonous eloquence

I won’t be deceived anymore by your innocent look

I won’t be betrayed anymore by duality of your words

For,

I reclaimed who I was and who I need to be

I know I am through this important learning

 

I may not know where I am

I may not know where headed I am

But I am now on the way to be me

For I know who I was

For I know who I am going to be!

 

December 17, 2011

 

 ©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/

DARE TO VENTURE DEEP

Being in a state of indecision – when you realize it – it opens the door to map the uncharted territory that was not possible or was myopic when you felt secured with tracked decisions en-route the perceptive dimensions of life.

Being in a state of indecision makes you feel locked, chained, tethered, bound to an unknown fate!

And why allow the fate to decide you?

Why let yourself be captive to the visibly visible options only?

Why allow the questions to leave you perplexed and numb to the extent to leave a trail that blames as if you could not work the riddle?

Why allow the negatives to prevail to the extent that they make your strength your very weakness?

Why not to try the other way round?

Why not make ‘the state of being in indecision’ a mapping exercise to find even higher tracks to be climbed?

The chronicle is hinged on uncertain moments when you find yourself looking for answers to scale further. And taking the challenge head-on here places you in the zone where you can touch the known yet unknown, explore the unseen and mobilize the volatile elements to build a life that is synonymous with you; that is synonymous with the natural flow of life.

If life is about living, its text is to be read with all the embedded messages and all the ‘in-between the lines’ notions of the flow of ‘being you’.

Demand, deduce, decide, define, declare – play with the summative elements but remember – being the simple you, being the honest Self of you, being the upright Soul of the humane existence and being the persona of a decisive integrity – is not that difficult as you had perceived or you still perceive!

Indecision is just a state of mind that also has the key to unlock the ‘Holy Grail’ of your long forgotten passion.

DARE TO VENTURE DEEP..

©/IPR: Santosh Chaubey – https://santoshchaubey.wordpress.com/