‘WHEEL-OILED’ OR ‘SOFT-PEDALED’?

ToonJunction

gathbandhan
‘WHEEL-OILED’ OR ‘SOFT-PEDALED’?

©RaginiChaubey
©SantoshChaubey

‘BUDGE…..T’!

ToonJunction

budget

‘BUDGE…..T’!

©RaginiChaubey
©SantoshChaubey

THE YOUNG KIM HAS SPOKEN AGAIN!

The Young (and Plump) Kim says his Rogue Nation is in the final leg of launching a nuclear capable Inter Continental Ballistic Missile (ICBM) that will be as ballistic as his tenure and words have been, ever since he took over the reins of the Rogue Nation in a December five years ago from the Great Rouge, who, in turn, had inherited the Rogue Nation from the Greatest Rouge ever walked in that part of the world.

Now it is another thing that this Young (and Plump) Kim can surpass even that Greatest Rogue in Rogueness.

Every Rogue of the Rogue Nation, be it the Greatest Rogue or the Great Rogue or the Young Rogue, have had this dream that one day their Roguness will go beyond the Greatness they already have once they have an ICBM that can carry weapons (including state of the art Rogue Nation’s nukes) to the Mightiest Nation on the Earth.

And they have been practicing it since ages – weighting for that moment to arrive.

Like it happens, the whole nature has conspired to derail that dream of the Greatness of the Rogue Nation.

But they have toiled hard. And have been consistent with their efforts.

Be it the Greatest Rogue or the Great Rogue or now the Young Rogue.

So while cementing their position as the undisputed representative of their people, giving them that rare hope to look at the bright side of life, something that no one knows when was last seen in the lives of the commoners of the Rogue Nation, they are also continuing with the mammoth cost that goes in building the Rogueness of their lands. Obviously, theirs must be very, very heavy hearts.

So, if the people of the Rogue Nation are making great sacrifices, their representatives are setting even bigger an example.

They are together in this quest it looks – the representatives are giving hopes – even if it means by coercive measures, as happens in case of larger societal interest – and people are buying those hopes, because they have no other option – after living a life of extreme hardship that the nature has forced them into.

Hope is the only trending commodity in the Rogue Nation available in abundance, thanks to the persistent efforts of its Rogues.

And how consistent the Rogues have been with their efforts becomes visible from the fact that the global community has been hooked since ages to any development that comes out from the Rogue Nation’s nuclear programme and its warning messages on how the nukes riding on the Rogue Nation’s great ICBMs will wreak havoc in the Mightiest Nation on the Earth.

And like they are developing their nukes and ICBMs and are on the brink of breaking-even, as the Young Kim (Rogue) let us know in his New Year message, they have been consistent with dishing out their messages, packaging them in ever more interesting formats, to let the world know that when it will be, how big it will be – the Rogue Nation’s wrath on the Mightiest Nation on the Earth.

And even in doing so, so diligently, they never forget the welfare side of it – of giving hope to their people – who are told that these messages are true and the Rogue Nation has already decimated the Mightiest Nation on the Earth – and is preparing for even great greater a feat.

They are practicing it. And in the larger interest, they are making their people practice it.

Immune from all – from the words coming out from the Mightiest Nation on the Earth – even if it is from the Mightiest Person of the Mightiest Nation as he asserted yesterday that the Rogue Nation’s ICBM won’t happen. He tweeted, “The Rogue Nation just stated that it is in the final stages of developing a nuclear weapon capable of reaching parts of the Mightiest Nation on the Earth. It won’t happen!.”

©SantoshChaubey

ONLY IN PAKISTAN: DONALD TRUMP WAS BORN IN PAKISTAN!

The article’s Hindi version appeared on iChowk.

Did you hear it? Did you laugh? After all, this is laughable that America’s next President Donald Trump was born in Pakistan. That Donald Trump who has shown a clear tilt towards India (and has crticised Pakistan severely)! That Donald Trump whose victory has made Pakistan quite uncomfortable! Neo News, a Pakistani broadcaster, had shown a news package last month, before Trump’s election, illuminating us with ‘only in Pakistan’ wisdom that Donald Trump was born in Pakistan.

According to the clip, the Neo News anchor says that Donald Trump is actually a Pakistani and it has added yet another aspect about Donald Trump on social media.

The voice-over then educates us that the Republican nominee Donald Trump was born in Pakistan and not in America. Trump’s original name, who was born on June 14, 1946 in Waziristan, is Dawood Ibrahim Khan. Trump had his initially schooling in a Madrassa. According to the clip Trump’s parents died in a road accident in 1954 and he was taken to London by a British-Indian Army captain in 1955. The Trump family had adopted him in 1955 and in this way Waziristan’s Dawood Ibrahim Khan became Donald Trump of Queens area of New York City.

The voice-over says that they (the Neo News folks) are not saying all this but this is going viral on social media. According to the Neo News package, those curious and diligent information-diggers have also found out Donald Trump’s childhood photographs, his DNA test results and his birth-certificate to prove his Pakistani origins.

Now it is no big deal to make news stories and packages on viral social media content but what is abnormal here that a news broadcaster picked this viral but silly and laughable content without applying any thought (if at all a line of thought exists).

Had it been part of some parody or laughter show we could have got some sense of its use there. But what to say of the Pakistani media that mostly survives on propaganda, especially the anti-India propaganda. Recently, when India had carried out surgical strike deep inside Pakistan-occupied-Kashmir, the whole Pakistani media had (as usual) become a mouth-organ of the Pakistani ruling establishment in telling to the world that the Indian claims of surgical strike was false and how the Pakistani missiles were ready to destroy India.

There were such bizarre/funny/ridiculous claims on the Pakistani prime time that you can only laugh – like this one that due to the ongoing hostilities and war-like situation between India and Pakistan, some 40,000 Indian soldiers had applied for sick leave fearing the wrath of the Pakistani army.

Anyway let’s be clear that the US rules don’t allow a person to become the US President who is not born in America. Arnold Schwarzenegger, the Hollywood legend, who was the Governor of California, can never become the US President because he was born in Austria. Even Barack Obama, the outgoing US President, had to show his birth certificate to clear the air that he was born in America (Hawaii) and Donald Trump who will replace Obama, had actively contributed to such conspiracy theories.

©SantoshChaubey

HAD NEVER SEEN SOCIAL PARITY IN INDIA LIKE THIS!

I had never seen social parity at this level, here in India, before this current phase that is undoing many historical stereotypes.

Being a media professional, I was aware of it since the moment it began, but it is only today that I got the first hand experience.

But before that, let’s be clear about it – that social parity basically applies to them who form the majority of our society – except out upper middles classes and elites (including some VIPism folks from the lower middle class). So this time also it is going to be about this ‘majority’. Like always, the other folks are never in this rate-race.

I had to go the Delhi airport today and I had only Rs. 500 notes in my wallet and some change that accounted for around Rs. 200. So, in spites of having a loaded purse, I was literally impoverished – to the hilt – because the airport ride needed anything around 500-1000 bucks depending on the mode of transport I would choose.

Okay, I could have gone the cashless way but there was this desperate urge to try the Delhi Metro route hoping that I would be able to get at least some change for my Rs. 500 notes. So there I was.

But to my dismay I found there (at Delhi Metro stations) sympathetic customer care executives or nonchalant cash counters but not the problem of my solution. And soon whatever change I had was gone.

And I was not alone. There were multitudes. How I came out of this quagmire is a story for another day. Today it is basically about the social parity this sudden move by the Government of India has brought where all the biggies have suddenly become commoners like us – at least for the stuff that they need cash to trade for – like in transportation or petrol pumps or for buying the stuff of daily usage like milk or grocery items. Now you can use your Rs. 500 or Rs. 1000 notes at many places but the problem is even those places are running dry.

So, all of a sudden, uniformity can be seen among masses thronging our roads or streets. Those having millions or those barely surviving on their salaries or daily earnings, they all can be seen in ATM or bank queues. I appreciate AIIMS for this sort of culture – in spite of having loads of people from VIP fulcrum or staff-linkages, a man flashing his latest iPhone model can be seen in same queue waiting for his turn along with the man who kills his waiting hours by playing with the buttons of basic feature phone.

If we leave some of the super-elite aside (after all, in every democratic society, a class like this always exists – after all, history needs to preserve its elements, even if it is elitism and VIPism), all in the society looked on an open platform today which had no extensions to offer.

They all are talking of the similar pains (and gains).

So, even if everyone was flashing his Rs. 500 or Rs. 1000 note, it meant nothing to the guy sitting on the other side. And it is the story of the whole country.

It was like – either everyone was victim – or everyone was perpetrator – though the victim corollary works better here.

It is like you have all – and you have nothing.

Everyone was looking in a similar social hue today – in fact has been looking like this since November 8 when prime minister Narendra Modi suddenly announced that the biggies of our currency flow would become unwanted existences post midnight.

©SantoshChaubey

LOVE IN THOSE HEADY DAYS

Love in those heady days
Fulsome with all its heady ways
When she would say it all
When he would do it all
Where he would go
There she would go
There silence had no place
Words were all to fill the space
Love in those heady days
Fulsome with all its heady ways
When it wasn’t planned
When it was on demand
When songs flew together
And souls danced together
Where life never sucked
Where love never ducked
The textbook love romanticized
With all the feelings fantacised
Be it sorrow or tomorrow
It was intended only to grow
Whether a cry on the sly
Or a fury with adrenaline high
He and she would take it all
She and he would never fall
Oh yes love in those heady days
Fulsome with all its heady ways

DTI-1 - Copy

LOVE IN THOSE HEADY DAYS

©SantoshChaubey

YADAVS’ FIRST FAMILY: A CARTOONIST’S DELIGHT :)

Well, that is exactly what has happened with recent events – developments, statements and even silence – everything gives an interesting sense of déjà vu. Everything has happened as it was thought to be – but with loads of moments that are pure delight for any cartoonist with an eye for political humour and satire.

We can say,

PAL MEIN TOLA PAL MEIN MASHA, KITNE RANG BADALTE HAIN.

SOMETIMES THEY PLAY FAST. SOMETIMES THEY PLAY LOOSE. HOW MANY COLOURS THEY CHANGE?

Or

(SOMETIMES IT PLAYS FAST. SOMETIMES IT PLAYS LOOSE. HOW MANY COLOURS IT CHANGES?)

Any which way you want to say 🙂

Or we can say,

A FAMILY THAT SPARS TOGETHER, SPEARS TOGETHER.

Or we can say,

A FAMILY THAT PRAYS TOGETHER, AFFRAYS TOGETHER.

Or we can say,

A FAMILY THAT PLAYS TOGETHER, DISPLAYS IT TOGETHER.

Or we can the staple one 🙂 🙂

A FAMILY..THAT DISAGREES TO DISAGREE.

muakhishiv-1

(CARTOON BY RAGINI CHAUBEY)

YADAVS’ FIRST FAMILY: A CARTOONIST’S DELIGHT 🙂

©SantoshChaubey

WHY COUNTRIES ARE DUCKING CHINA ON DONKEY EXPORT?

The article’s Hindi version appeared on iChowk.

It has become global headlines these days that how some African countries have stopped donkey export to China altogether while some others have put stiff regulations on it.

Do you know the donkey population of India? I am sure that apart from few concerned experts, no one would be aware of it (and rightly). According to India’s livestock census of 2014, the total donkey population in India was 3.2 million in 2012.

But why would I bother to know about it? What else but the natural human curiosity!

Many countries, especially African, are banning donkey export to China. (Now the global donkey import-export business, China and other main markets for it and its state of affairs in India can make for a separate innovative research topic.)

But why are they doing so?

EJIAO

Ejiao is a blood tonic made from donkey-hide gelatin obtained from the animal’s skin. It is a popular traditional medicine in China which is quite popular, especially among women, and is used for anaemia, cough, insomnia, wound, boils and eruptions. It is also used in face and anti-ageing creams. China produces almost 5,000 tonnes of ejiao annually that itself is indicator of its immense popularity in the Chinese society.

But ejiao’s increasing demand coupled with China’s rapid industrialization has caused a rapid decline in China’s donkey population. According to reports, China had around 110 million donkeys in 1990s which has drastically come down to almost half, at 60 million, and is seeing a consistent decline of 3,00,000 donkeys every year. Industrialization has proved a double-edged sword for donkey population in China. It increased disposable income of people and introduced machines that mechanized the ejiao making process thereby causing huge spurt in demand (with the supply to meet it.) Even the donkeys who were otherwise used for farming and carrying loads, they also became priced possessions of the booming ejiao industry.

ejiaocollageoct8

Exploitation increased so much so that donkey’s population rapidly came down and to meet the never satiated domestic demand, China had to import donkey. And China looked to the African markets for it where it has invested heavily.

All went well initially. The Chinese demand skyrocketed donkey prices in the African markets. Many black-markets cropped up. Legal and illegal export of donkeys to China increased manifold. As it had happened in China, people in these countries also started using monkeys exclusively for export, removing them from traditional farming and load carrying work.

But, as had happened in China, the same thing is happening in these African countries as well. Due to an ever increasing demand from China and due to the lucre of money involved, mindless donkey exports from the African countries increased to the extent that the continent is now witnessing a rapid decline in its donkey population and many countries are now worried that if left unchecked, the trend may devastate the whole breed of the animal.

So countries like Niger and Burkina Faso have banned donkey export totally while countries like Kenya and South Africa have started putting tough measures to regulate this cattle trade and it is expected that more countries will follow soon.

These developments have initiated a national debate on ejiao in China. Experts and analysts are burning the midnight oil debating and strategizing on how to increase domestic population of donkeys in China including encouraging and incentivizing people to develop donkey farms.

And if the pressure of demand is so high, there would obviously be fake and counterfeit products in the market. The condition has become so chronic that many ejiao manufacturing outfits are issuing DNA certificates with their products proclaiming authenticity of their ejiao. A natural corollary to this is the rampant theft of donkeys which has forced many farms to implant identification chips in their donkeys.

©SantoshChaubey

Featured Image Courtesy: Wikipedia

STOP LOOKING FOR ROMANTICISM IN LOVE. DON’T IDEALIZE FRIENDSHIP ANYMORE. :)

So, this year’s Friendship Day is over, or for me, the first Sunday of August. But this year, it seemed, like the Valentine’s Day, the Friendship Day is also going to see some meteoric rise in its profile in the near future.

It seems the Friendship Day is also on way to get upscale with a swift rise in visibility, relevance (or which way you want to look at it) and mannerisms (with all the reservations or slants you may have).

What told me that it was the Friendship Day was my cellphone when it started beeping the WhatsApp messages it was receiving one after the other – and dot at midnight – at 12 AM. There were many, so many that I don’t remember when I had received such a great lot the last time except the New Year wishes.

And the flow continued the next morning when I opened my Facebook account to check the feed. There were messages and wall posts by the people in my contact book. People were busy writing and singing friendship paeans, were busy liking, reacting and responding to the wisdom quotes explaining the real essence of friendship. Some were posting even songs and video themes.

It all sounded so good. It looked like the whole creation had become your friend. And the best thing about it was you didn’t need to put efforts for it – that you didn’t need to throw your so-called post-modern, over-liberal tantrums. It just happened. It was so spontaneous.

There were many who had not bothered about you in ages, those who had conveniently forgotten about your anniversaries (including your birthday) – but see the prowess of the communication technologies – it wiped out all the time lags in one go – all the grievances (if they really existed) – reconnecting you to one and all. All the distances got jettisoned in one go. It seemed more effective and direct than anything you could ever have imagined.

The mainstream media proved the “change” it needed to be for the Valentine’s Day to become a pan-India phenomenon – to become an intrinsic part from the cultural import it used to be – to gel with the ‘cool, urban lifestyle’ – to influence and civilize the ‘still untouched rural or small town life’ – and to co-opt the remnants who still felt otherwise.

The social media is doing the same for the Friendship Day, especially WhatsApp and Facebook – this Friendship Day told me. And its good.

So..Happy Friendship Day folks..(and my belated Valentine’s wishes for those who have taken a plunge).. 🙂

Yes, like everything else, a Valentine’s Day – or a Friendship Day – has both, positive and negative, facets. It all depends on you – how do you perceive life – that how do you see good to feel good – that if you walk the talk – that how do you walk the talk. It all depends on which side of the line you are – that you exude the new-age coolness from your persona – or you are still about the same boring stuff that defines an old school product.

It is like about your girlfriend/beloved (or boyfriend). It is for sure that your girlfriend (who may have become your life-partner by now – whom you see as the most sincere and committed person in your life) would have posed this question – “Though it doesn’t matter but can tell me how much do you earn?” – and you would burn the midnight oil in convincing her of the depth of your pocket – otherwise she would start with her calculations (or vice versa in some cases).

And you don’t see any conflicts here – because this is the new-age paradigm – the new parallel practical of the old school. There would be countless folks who would have faced this situation and would have acted in the similar manner. And the trend is only going to pick up – because such girls (or boys, whosoever fits the bill) are fundamentally correct. Financial security must come first. One cannot substantiate emotions just by big, old school ideals. For them, the practical considerations come first – even before initiating on the thought that would ultimately lead to the thought of being together with someone “special”.

And people are getting even more ‘cool and practical’ with friendship. Now the old school inhibitions seldom come into play here. Social media platforms like Facebook or Google Plus have made everyone in your address list your friend. They have categorized friendship in multiple layers and the best thing about it is you don’t need to be ‘chuddy buddy’ with someone with his (or her) best friend. And even best friends now have categories – like the one with whom you can do your routine time pass stuff at 4 AM – or the one with whom you can tag along with during your time out sorties and – or the one who can act as your ‘this number or that number’ before your ‘friends’ and so on .

And it’s all in the name of new-age spirit and newfound principles riding high on the waves of revolutions – first the mainstream media – and now the social media – the new communication technologies which have bridged the gaps – which have wiped out the distances – which have killed the time lags – which have caused the feedbacks (of every sort) to move in the real time – which have cocktailed cultures like a highly skilled bartender does blurring the lines of this or that side – and which have created perception of new identities.

Folks, just imbibe this spirit. Stop looking for romanticism in love. Don’t idealize friendship anymore. The new ‘cool and practical’ breed is as right in its approach to life as the old schools guys are. It’s just that they are populating the universe very rapidly now – outnumbering their old peers. The old school folks would learn to live with it.

©SantoshChaubey

SO..IT WAS THE FRIENDSHIP DAY YESTERDAY (AND ALSO NAG PANCHAMI).. :)

So, this year’s Friendship Day is over, or for me, the first Sunday of August. But this year, it seemed, like the Valentine’s Day, the Friendship Day is also going to see some meteoric rise in its profile in the near future.

It seems the Friendship Day is also on way to get upscale with a swift rise in visibility, relevance (or which way you want to look at it) and mannerisms (with all the reservations or slants you may have).

What told me that it was the Friendship Day was my cellphone when it started beeping the WhatsApp messages it was receiving one after the other – and dot at midnight – at 12 AM. There were many, so many that I don’t remember when I had received such a great lot the last time except the New Year wishes.

And the flow continued the next morning when I opened my Facebook account to check the feed. There were messages and wall posts by the people in my contact book. People were busy writing friendship paeans, were busy liking, reacting and responding to the wisdom quotes explaining the real essence of friendship. Some were posting even songs and video themes.

It all sounded so good. It looked like the whole creation had become your friend. And the best thing about it was you didn’t need to put efforts for it – that you didn’t need to throw your so-called post-modern, over-liberal tantrums. It just happened. It was so spontaneous. There were many who had not bothered about you in ages, those who had conveniently forgotten about your anniversaries (including your birthday) – but see the prowess of the communication technologies – it wiped out all the time lags in one go – reconnecting you to one and all.

The mainstream media proved the “change” it needed to be for the Valentine’s Day to become a pan-India phenomenon – to gel with the ‘cool, urban lifestyle’ – to influence and civilize the ‘still untouched rural or small town life’.

The social media is doing the same for the Friendship Day, especially WhatsApp and Facebook – the last day told me. And its good.

So..Happy Friendship Day folks..

Yes, like everything else, a Valentine’s Day or a Friendship Day has both, positive and negative, facets. It all depends on you – how do you perceive life – that how do you see good to feel good.

And also Happy Nag Panchami.. 🙂

Especially for us Banarasis and for the people (friends) from the eastern part of the country..again especially from (eastern Uttar Pradesh and Bihar – well, I did not bother to go into more details – but the festival where we worship snakes is observed throughout India).

Worshipping animals is with us since the advent of human civilizations. So let them feel whatever they want to feel – let them feel if they want to feel superior by marking fellows like us inferior or backward or superstitious or over-religious or what not. For us, it is more about getting nostalgic. Anyway, let’s assimilate their good or bad feelings in the spirit of the Friendship Day.

After all, it is for sure that your girlfriend (who may be your life-partner by now – whom you see as the most sincere and committed person in your life) would have posed this question – “Though it doesn’t matter but can tell me how much do you earn?” – and you would burn the midnight oil in convincing her of the depth of your pocket – otherwise she would start with her calculations. And you don’t see any conflicts here. Well, there would be countless folks who would have faced this situation and would have acted in the similar manner. And the trend is only going to pick up – because such girls (or boys, whosoever fits the bill) are fundamentally correct. Financial security must come first.

And it’s all in the name of new-age spirit and newfound principles riding high on the waves of revolutions – first the mainstream media – and now the social media – the new communication technologies which have bridged the gaps, which have wiped out the distances, which have killed the time lags, and which have caused the feedbacks (of every sort) to move in the real time.

Folks, just imbibe this spirit. Stop looking for romanticism in love. Don’t idealize friendship anymore.

©SantoshChaubey